Suicide??? close to doing it Help!?

I'm just feeling suicidal and I'm so close to doing suicide but i decide to post my question on yahoo answers just to see if anyone will talk to me so its like a cry for help. I know deep deep down inside i don't wanna do this but i think i need to if no one takes their time just to talk to me for a bit or just be a friend. cant talk to the suicidal hotline don't have my own cell phone and parents wouldn't never let me call them they don't even believe in suicide. cant talk to friend don't have ANY i beg i beg please talk to me before i decide and do it.